I am numb this morning. Yesterday morning I woke up and Princess couldn't walk on her back legs and was stumbling and falling. The day before she stayed in her bed all afternoon and refused food or water. Yesterday morning she refused water and food again with inability to walk. I called the vet to see if Dr. Racier would be in that day. She wasn't due back in until Thurs. I couldn't wait to Thurs so I asked the lady to give me the most compassionate vet available that day and she scheduled the appointment. At 11 we took Princess to the vets. We had to help her down the steps and then lift her into the car with a bedsheet. I sat in the back with her as she put her paws around my neck. She loved the car and she enjoyed the ride, not knowing what was going to happen to her. I told her that we were going to help her. She was showered with tears and kisses and pets all the way. When we got there they put us right back into a room away from everything else. I called it the death room. They said the dr. would be right in. PTL, guess what the Lord did for us? Dr. Racier, her primary vet, came in on her day off to help us through this and take care of Princess. Oh, how she loved Princess. Now that is a true caring vet. The office had called and told her we were coming in to see another vet, and she came right over. Princess couldn't get up on even a little table, so we put blankets down on the floor and they put a pillow under her head. I laid on the blanket on one side of her, and Vince on the other. Dr. Racier gave her a sedative for a dog twice her size and she told me that she will quiet down and go right to sleep. Then she would give her the next injection to put her down.
It happened just that way. After the sedative she was out like a light with eyes wide open (which the vet says is what happens, not like in the movies when the dog closes his eyes during being put down). I kept kissing her and petting her and telling her I loved her, but Dr. Racier said she really couldn't hear me. Then she looked at me and gave the injection to put her down. I kept petting her and Vince said "She's gone." I didn't even realize it, but Vince had had his hand on her heart all the time and watched her breathing. He said the heart beat got slower and slower and finally stopped. My little girl was gone and she is now in God's hands. I asked God to take real good care of her. The house feels empty and dead without her asking to go out, or go for a walk, or if she wanted a treat. After 13 years she was family and we both knew each other's ways and looks that communicated for different things she wanted.

Today it is like the life was taken out of me. I remember going through this with Tiffany and felt the same way, but I had Princess so much longer. Today I can't eat food or water, and who wants to walk alone without the leash and my dog in my hand.

Princess, I love you. Thank you for being such a sweet precious little girl who gave so much love that kept on giving.

And Lord, thank you for allowing Dr. Racier to surprise us by coming in for us and for Princess.