Yes, it is that late, and it has taken me about an hour or more to try to redesign this blog page to look like that of the more experienced and creative blogger. Today was a day of travel from Toms River to White Plains to bring down a young man to visit his Mom down here who has cancer. He seemed so happy to see her and to see her looking better than what he had expected. Life is hard, many questions are unanswered, yet, we must show up for life anyway. That's how I express it. Jesus wants me to attend life and to serve and worship Him regardless of the inward pain. Life is wounded. He is our Healer, our ultimate healing will come from Him. I need to hang onto that every moment of my life, as there is fear and despair in every moment of my life. I forged through it with the Lord to accomplish the things that must be done regardless of my emotions and mental battles. Today, while watching a video of the woman touching the hem of His garment, I filled up as I find myself many times just clutching onto the hem as He walks down the street and everyone is cheering, but I am clutching. Clinical depression is so exhausting. Some nights I fall into bed almost crying in extreme fatigue as I had to perform my duties and keep pushing the dark cloud aside and be a testimony to Him regardless of the pain. No one Understands Like Jesus, as the song goes. He has carried me through so many walks "through the shadow of death" in my life. Yet, I am still here and have not sucumbed to the finality of the disease. Praise the Lord. He saves, and He keeps.